55 Fiction Friday! September 28, 2007

It's time again for 55 Fiction Friday!
Quick explanation: 55 fiction is a very, very short story of exactly 55 words. It needs to have a character, conflict and resolution.

The Wikipedia article on 55 Fiction is here and some great examples are here..

If you'd like to play along, I tell you how at the end of this post.


One of KyLydia's friends, Guinness74, has started playing with us! Here's his 55!
Jonas slumped silently in the kitchen chair; a glazed stare blurred the clock on the microwave. His nearly empty beer bottle dangled precariously from his fingers as he pondered the burning steak on the grill outside. Lyle Lovett sang about Ensenada in the background. Nothing mattered anymore, she was gone and he was alone.

(Sneaky, trying to put it in the comments section of a three week old 55!)

Go check out Lydia's blog for her very funny 55 , Sadness Television, this week!


UPDATE-UPDATE-UPDATE-UPDATE-UPDATE-UPDATE-UPDATE-UPDATE
MrWurdi's 55 for the week:
Untitled
I was sitting down, strapped to my seat. I was pulling and pushing, right then left - screaming as everything passed before me. I had been in tight places before but this was the tightest yet. I had to keep control or lose it all. I’m almost there…

Ah, yes, this air race is mine!


Here’s my 55 for the week
Rude Awakening
The warm cocoon of sleep cradled her. Suddenly, crushing pain and muffled cries interrupted her slumber.

“Give me the freaking drugs,” she heard, faintly. “I want my drugs NOW!”

The dark pressure gave way to blinding light and a rude fellow manhandling her delicate body before smacking her on the ass.

Happy Birthday, Baby Girl!



(Today is my daughter's birthday.)



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Come play! Add your story to the comments or put it on your blog and I'll link to it. It's fun. You'll like it.
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What Can One Person Do?

When a task seems so daunting you don't even know where to start, the question of "What can I do?" might discourage you from even trying. Let me tell you what one person can do. One person can have an idea and share that idea with another person. From there, it grows until "just one person" turns into a team with a mission.

Susan G. Komen's sister, Nancy Brinker, made a promise. As her sister was losing her battle with breast cancer, Nancy promised to do what she could to warn women that breast cancer can strike unexpectedly and that mammograms and breast self-examinations can save lives. Nancy started the Susan G. Komen for the Cure foundation and has made huge strides in research, education, and assistance.

Where does the money raised go? What does it do? It provides meals to families dealing with breast cancer; it provides breast cancer patients with transportation to and from treatment; it helps underserved patients receive medication and mammograms; and it helps patients get prostheses or wigs. It funds research. It provides for education and awareness. It matters. Every penny matters. Each "just one person" who does something, anything, makes a difference.

Is it all serious? No. There was much laughter and celebration associated with the race weekend. Survivors were cheered, friends reunited, fake boobs dispensed, cookies eaten, money raised. Lots of money. As the matching funds come in over the next few weeks, that dollar amount will rise. A screen shot of the TeamGDT page is below.



I'm so proud to be a part of this cause. I AM THE CURE!

55 Fiction Friday! September 21, 2007

It's time again for 55 Fiction Friday!
Quick explanation: 55 fiction is a very, very short story of exactly 55 words. It needs to have a character, conflict and resolution.

The Wikipedia article on 55 Fiction is here and some great examples are here..

If you'd like to play along, I tell you how at the end of this post.



Phishez at Sanity Optional has offered up a 55.
His skin slides over her damp skin. Everywhere he touches feels instantly hot. And instantly cool when he moves away. It is all she can feel. He pushes into her. She moans. Her back arches and fingers scrabble uselessly against his shoulders. With one final thrust he shudders and is still. It is all over.

***** Well done, you naughty gal!


MrWurdi's 55 for the week:
One if by Weight, Two if by Volume
Everything has such a tight tolerance. Some by weight; some by volume, you would think for such a precise chemical bonding someone would standardize all of this. All these charts to consult, making sure the right measure and the right elements. Mixing, blending, heating, cooling, and proper timing.

Chemistry’s very important; coconut cake’s a bitch!


Here’s my 55 for the week – inspired by Phishez hot, sexy shortie.
Touching Moment
I’d noticed him watching me earlier. Now, hot hands glide over my body, touching every part of me, giving equal attention to every curve. My legs spread, my nerves taut, I wait for the next touch. I’m so vulnerable, so exposed.

When you’re in a dating slump, getting through airport security can actually be fun.




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Come play! Add your story to the comments or put it on your blog and I'll link to it. It's fun. You'll like it.
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I’m on my way to Boston for the Susan G. Komen 5K Race for the Cure this weekend. When I last checked, TeamGDT had a fund-raising total of $86,452! Thank you for the kind words and donations. I’ll give an update next week.
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The Trail of Tears

This past weekend was the Trail of Tears remembrance ride. MrWurdi and I were on one of an estimated 150,000 motorcycles that made the approximately 200 mile trip from Chattanooga, TN to Florence, AL. The line of motorcycles stretched for about 50 miles.



From the Official Trail of Tears Motorcycle Ride Website:

The Annual Trail of Tears Motorcycle Ride was started in 1994 by Bill Cason to mark one of the trails used during the 1838 removal of Native Americans from their homelands in the Southeast to Oklahoma. The ride started at Ross’s Landing in Chattanooga, TN with eight riders and ended with 100 riders in Waterloo, AL. The ride has now grown to over 150,000 riders, making it the largest organized motorcycle ride in the world.

I know I don’t have the words to adequately express how amazing it was to be a part of this. People lined the streets in the towns we traveled through and people who live along the route sat or stood in their front yards to wave at and cheer the passing line of motorcycles. Other motorcyclists waited for their chance to join the line.


As we crossed bridges, we saw people who’d come out on their boats to watch the procession.




American flags were seen in abundance as well as many tribal flags from the various Indian nations represented. The flags flew from overpasses, motorcycles, and vehicles parked alongside Highway 72.


The main ride stopped in Madison, AL for lunch while our group broke off to stop at a friend’s co-workers house. They hold a cookout each year in their front yard located on the Trail of Tears Corridor. From the side of the road, we were able to see the front of the ride – something we couldn’t see from our initial position, some ten miles back in the line.

When we arrived at McFarland Park in Florence, AL, MrWurdi described it as “the Woodstock of chrome and leather.”


At the park, a pow wow was held that included an opening ceremony, war dances, and an honoring of warriors – including U.S. veterans from various wars.


One of the tribal leaders made an announcement prior to the honoring ceremonies. He asked everyone to stand in honor of the warriors and to refrain from taking photos during that time. Later, when permission for photography was given, I was able to get a few pictures of the war dances. The drumming, singing and dancing gave a glimpse of what it must have been like so many years ago.

Although most of what happened was wonderful, I did get angry at one point. Not only did one woman completely disregard the request for no photos, she actually called out to one of the participants, asking him to pose. Disgraceful. The couple in front of us were sitting, eating their funnel cakes, and chatting. Damn it. These men and women risked their lives for their country and you can’t stop running and filling your mouths for 10 minutes to show them a little respect? A loud throat clearing on my part stopped the chitter-chatter but their lack of respect for the warriors infuriated me.

The weekend was unforgettable. Next year, I hope that MrWurdi and I are able to not only participate as much as we did this year but to continue on to Oklahoma for the rest of the ride.

55 Fiction Friday! September 14, 2007

It's time again for 55 Fiction Friday!
Quick explanation: 55 fiction is a very, very short story of exactly 55 words. It needs to have a character, conflict and resolution.

The Wikipedia article on 55 Fiction is here and some great examples are here..

If you'd like to play along, I tell you how at the end of this post.



CaveBtch is playing this week!
Is there a Chef in the House?

Damn, Helen hated making fried chicken. Too raw, too done, too greasy. The last time she made fried chicken it was just embarrassing and there were witnesses. Bad fried chicken and the bananna pudding that was like soup. Helen just shouldn't make Southern food; she sucks at it. She thinks she'll go to Popeye's instead.


Ima notes: Helen is a chef!

Lydia, at Nothing Rhymes with Lydia... Well, Except That, has started doing 55 Fiction with us, too. Go check out her first 55! I think she's got a real talent for this. I'm also so very excited as I will be meeting Lydia next weekend in Boston when all of TeamGDT gathers to Race for the Cure!


Here's my 55 for this week:
Thank You for Your Support

Designer Jacob Wilson announced today that he has developed the perfect brassiere.

“This bra hides embarrassing nipple erections caused by cold or arousal and eliminates bouncing of breasts by using lightweight, yet strong, structural materials,” he claimed at the press conference.

He was severely beaten by a crowd of angry men immediately after his announcement.


Another note: My 55 today is based on an old joke that I've modified for my Boob Week 55.
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Come play! Add your story to the comments or put it on your blog and I'll link to it. It's fun. You'll like it.
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Historical Boob Trivia

Boobs have been celebrated, reviled, revealed, covered, lifted, separated, bound, augmented, reduced, removed, and more. While the entire history of the boob is interesting, I’ll leave further research to you and just give you a few highlights.

Venus is kind of famous for being topless. Sometimes, when I hear the word ‘Venus,’ I admit Bananarama comes to mind but that’s not really my fault. I blame MTV.

The Venus de Milo was my next thought.

I think she lost her right to bear arms somewhere along the way. Poor thing.

According to Wikipedia, “The Venus is not a realistic portrait but rather an idealization of the female figure.” Below is a rather famous Venus figurine, the Venus of Willendorf:

(This image used with permission of the owner, Matthias Kabel. Reuse must include credit to the owner.)

“…idealization of the female figure.”
Would someone please explain to me why the hell am I trying to lose weight? Bring on the tres leches cake!

A Christian saint, Saint Agatha, was said to have had her breasts cut off as one of the tortures she endured. In art, she is often shown carrying her breasts on a platter. She has recently been recognized as the patron saint of breast cancer patients.

Kannagi, in a South Indian Tamil legend, violently removed her breast and used it to curse a city.

Marie Antoinette’s breasts were said to have inspired the shape of champagne glasses.


Janet Jackson’s boobs caused more than a little bit of controversy but, as you can see, she was not the first famous person to suffer a very public wardrobe malfunction.

Sophia Loren's expression kind of makes you believe she wasn't that pleased with Jayne Mansfield's outfit and nipple peep show, doesn't it?

Lastly, rumor has it that laws against women being topless in public are starting to be challenged…successfully! Check out the Wikipedia article on Topfreedom.

Let's Get Serious about Boobs for a Minute

Did you know?

- Ten to fifteen percent of breast cancers are not detected by mammography?

- Men are also at risk for developing breast cancer?

- Having no children, or a first child after age 30, are among some of the risk factors for breast cancer?

- Breast Cancer accounts for 30% of all new cancer cases in women.

- When breast cancer is confined to the breast, the 5-year survival rate is over 95%.

- Breast cancer is the #2 killer of women ages 35 to 54, and approximately 80 percent of those diagnosed with breast cancer have no known risk factors.


Early detection is key. Do a monthly self-exam. Get a yearly clinical exam. Follow your doctor’s guidance on mammograms and other diagnostics tests.


Coming up tomorrow... Boobs in history - surprisingly, not political!

A Poem, a Haiku, and a Limerick Walk into a Blog

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It's BOOB WEEK at The Wordy Bitch. As the Saturday, September 15th deadline for donations approaches, I'm focusing on boobs. In Saving 2nd Base, I gave the details on TeamGDT and what we're trying to do to help find a cure for breast cancer.

Boob poetry seemed a good way to start the week. Enjoy!

Boob Poem
The men I meet are fond of boobs
But I can’t help my jeers,
“What you’re looking at aren’t eyes
And boobs do not have ears!”

Boob Haiku
Boobs change over time.
It’s so completely unfair!
Once round and now long.

Boob Limerick
Boobs used for nursing are pure
Boobs flashed for beads, I’m not sure
Virtue or vice
Boobs sure are nice
Boobs: Why we RACE FOR THE CURE!
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My goal this week is to entertain as well as fundraise. If you're so inclined, please donate.
Learn more about TeamGDT and bid on auction items.
Order the Team GDT cookbook, Eat for the Cure, directly from the publisher..
( . )( . )

55 Fiction Friday! September 7, 2007

It's time again for 55 Fiction Friday!
Quick explanation: 55 fiction is a very, very short story of exactly 55 words. It needs to have a character, conflict and resolution.

The Wikipedia article on 55 Fiction is here and some great examples are here..

If you'd like to play along, I tell you how at the end of this post.



Here's my 55 for this week:

Limit

Fifty-five, fifty-five. It rang in her head. Why was it so hard? It seemed simple enough. It was simple, right? Fifty-five, fifty-five. No more, no less. Just fifty-five. She pounded her fists in frustration and with an irritated yet resigned sigh turned to look at him.

“Ma’am? Do you know how fast you were going?”


MrWurdi's 55

Knock, Knock! Who's There?

Here's to you, church door knocker.

That's right, you took the time to attend classes about our Lord Savior and now you're spreading the word.

You learned how to knock like a cop with a warrant - demanding attention to your passive message of love.

Pamphlet delivered, name checked off. Next!

It's all about the love.


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Come play! Add your story to the comments or put it on your blog and I'll link to it. It's fun. You'll like it.
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Saving 2nd Base!

Dear Blog Reader,

I am not becoming a professional begger. This is the one major fund-raiser I participate in each year where I ask for cash donations. I will not bombard you with requests for money. I anticipate only having two or three posts before this year's fund-raising deadline so if you aren't interested in donating, please bear with me. I'll have a banner on my page for the next two weeks.

Please consider making a tax deductible donation.

Great strides have been made over the years in the treatment of breast cancer but a cure still doesn’t exist. The Susan G. Komen For The Cure Foundation is a leading force behind cancer research and awareness.

As some of you might know, I’ve been doing Weight Watchers for several years. I started participating on one of the Weight Watchers message boards for tips and support. In 2003, a bunch of my virtual friends from Weight Watchers decided to make an exercise goal of doing the Susan Komen 5K Race for the Cure in Boston. Not only was it a good way to exercise, it was an excellent cause. Many of the people on the message board, including myself, supported the team with donations and encouragement.

The next year, I and nearly 30 other women from all over the country went to Boston to join the original Team GDT. The year I joined, our team raised over $33,000 in donations.

Thanks to some amazing support, we raised almost $40,000 last year, placing 1st in the team rankings, and making Team GDT the nation’s top non-corporate fundraising team for Komen. Since our team began, we have raised over $125,000!

I am calling upon your generosity and support to help us raise as much money as possible to help find a cure. I am honored to wear the names of those you’d like to honor, support or memorialize on my shirt while I participate in the race. When you make your donation, please include those names or enter them in the comments section and I will wear them proudly.

Any amount, big or small, is GREATLY appreciated! So please, as you are willing and able, help me in my mission to create a life where my daughter and granddaughters never have to worry about a lump in their breast. Thank you for your time, support and generous donations! With your help, the fight will continue and a cure will be found!

Because of the public exposure of our team and the nature of the Internet, I prefer to not have my real name on the list. So, if you’d like to make a tax deductible donation, you can click on the link below to access the donation site.

Official Komen Site
After clicking the “Sponsor a Participant” button, type in the following:

First Name: Mz
Last Name: Grinch

There'll be a link to my donation page right below.

Or, you can use this quick link: I Like Boobies or click this banner.


TeamGDT has a website. Click on this banner and you can learn more about the team and bid on auction items.


The team also contributed recipes. An amazing woman on our team compiled those recipes into a beautiful cookbook. You can order the Team GDT cookbook, Eat for the Cure, directly from the publisher. Here's a picture of the front cover:



Much love and thanks in advance,
Ima Wurdibitsch aka MzGrinch aka Too Many Aliases to Mention