Monday, December 11, 2006

Random Thought #2: Travel Notes


I'm on the road (or in the air) again. I've mentioned my affection for airport bars. That remains true. Tonight's blog is just a few random thoughts from my travels today.

* There's a spit of land on approach to the Detroit airport that looks just like a sperm.

* I love the Sky Box at the Detroit airport.

* Always get a sleeve for your hot Starbucks beverage.

* Religious dicussions in airport bars CAN be good.

* On the people movers - left is walk, right is stand.

* Some airport employees are not AT ALL familiar with their airport.

* You can do good deeds anywhere you go.

* It blows people's minds when you switch from reading Nietzsche to reading Harold Robbins.

* Not all babies will scream through the flight.

* Sometimes, the people sitting next to you will smell like pee.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hah hah hah wordy bitch, you are the ulitmate GMILF!! Have a great night and thanks for the beer. And yes, sometimes people smell like pee (but the more PC term is "old cheese")

Anonymous said...

Here, I'll add some more:

1) There's only one thing in the universe more commercialized than NASCAR, and that's the free, in-flight magazines.
2) Fly long enough, and you actually get to sit by a nun at least once.
3) Getting on-board a 767 with an M-16A4 is pretty cool, until you remember the next year of your life will be spent in Iraq.
4) Airline pillows are perhaps the cruelest tease ever invented, next to my wife. Like a tea bag on steroids, they offer the promise of comfort, yet deliver kneck pains only experienced by olympic Greco-Roman wrestlers after an hour of use.
5) If you ever sit next to a guy from Trinidad travelling to a body art convention who also formerly served as a UK soldier in Ireland, be prepared for a pretty cool conversation.
6) Flying in an Army uniform when the captain comes over the intercom and announces Saddam was just captured is a great way to get lots of hugs, high fives, and free alcohol.
7) People with mp3 players make really lousy seat-mates.
8) When flying at altitude in a plane with a non-pressurized cabin, the flight crew will puss out and make you put on an oxygen mask before you can get a good buzz.
9) Boarding on a Southwest flight reminds you of the only time in your life you decided to "Go Greyhound."
10) Anytime you get on a helicopter, make sure you tell the flight crew that you have never flown on a helo and are a little concerned. That way, you will get to experience the thrill of pulling the maximum number of negative g's and hard banking. When you can release a water bottle in front of your face and see it float in front of you for 2 seconds, you know your flight is being piloted by a team of professionals that will go that extra mile in an attempt to reduce you to a blubbering mess.